Transcript
Erin Davis: Okay, I need some parenting advice. How do you help your kiddos—or your grand-kiddos—get out the wiggles!? Portia, how old is your baby girl?
Portia Collins: She’s two.
Erin: She’s two. I know she has a lot of wiggles!
Portia: Yes!
Erin: And how do you help her get out the wiggles?
Portia: I don’t! She just wiggles, and I’ve learned to live with it.
Erin: Gayle, how many grandchildren do you have?
Gayle Villalba: Four grands . . . and going on four great-grands!
Erin: Whoa! So you’ve got some experience with the wiggles. So a kiddo has the wiggles; help me, because I have four boys. We’ve got lots of wiggles!
Gayle: I can’t help you. I think you run them hard and fast, when you can.
Erin: Yes, that’s my whole parenting strategy. Exhaust them! Sometimes when they’re in the car as we’re driving down …
Erin Davis: Okay, I need some parenting advice. How do you help your kiddos—or your grand-kiddos—get out the wiggles!? Portia, how old is your baby girl?
Portia Collins: She’s two.
Erin: She’s two. I know she has a lot of wiggles!
Portia: Yes!
Erin: And how do you help her get out the wiggles?
Portia: I don’t! She just wiggles, and I’ve learned to live with it.
Erin: Gayle, how many grandchildren do you have?
Gayle Villalba: Four grands . . . and going on four great-grands!
Erin: Whoa! So you’ve got some experience with the wiggles. So a kiddo has the wiggles; help me, because I have four boys. We’ve got lots of wiggles!
Gayle: I can’t help you. I think you run them hard and fast, when you can.
Erin: Yes, that’s my whole parenting strategy. Exhaust them! Sometimes when they’re in the car as we’re driving down the highway, I’ll say, “Nose on knees, boys!” Those boys have to put their noses on their knees for a minute, because their hands are . . .
Gayle: . . . whacking at each other, right?
Erin: Well, we’re not talking about the wiggles, really. We are continuing to walk through the book of Ruth. But in this session I want us to consider sitting still, spiritually speaking. When we have those kinds of “spiritual wiggles”—when we just want to wiggle our way out of a situation or take control of a situation—what do we do?
So, let’s recap Ruth a little bit. What have we seen so far? We have read chapters 1 and 2 in Ruth, which means we’re halfway through this gem of a book. I love this! It’s short, compact. You get from beginning to end really quickly. Catch us up to speed, Portia. What has happened so far?
Portia: Naomi has lost her husband; Ruth has lost her husband. They have come back to Bethlehem. And now Ruth has met Boaz. She is gleaning in his field (I love the word “gleaning,” by the way!).
Erin: I do, too! But I don’t actually want to do it; it’s not easy work! But that’s what happened so far; it’s about to get even more interesting.
Portia: Yes, plot twist!
Erin: Let’s pick it up in Ruth chapter 3. I’m going to read us verses 1–9. I hope that when you listen to the Women of the Bible podcast, you have your Bible handy. So grab it and turn with us to Ruth chapter 3.
Then Naomi her mother-in-law [that’s Ruth’s mother-in-law] said to her, "My daughter, should I not seek rest for you, that it may be well with you? Is not Boaz our relative, with whose young women you were? See, he is winnowing barley tonight at the threshing floor. Wash therefore and anoint yourself, and put on your cloak and go down to the threshing floor, but do not make yourself known to the man until he has finished eating and drinking. But when he lies down, observe the place where he lies. Then go and uncover his feet and lie down, and he will tell you what to do.”
Now, I love my mother-in-law, she’s wonderful, but she has given me instructions in this much detail many a time, and that’s what Naomi’s telling Ruth: “Do this and do this and do this and do this . . .” And I’m not sure that I usually respond like Ruth did.
And she replied, "All that you say I will do." So she went down to the threshing floor and did just as her mother-in-law had commanded her. And when Boaz had eaten and drunk, and his heart was merry, he went to lie down at the end of the heap of grain.
Then she came softly and uncovered his feet and lay down. At midnight the man was startled and turned over, and behold, a woman lay at his feet! He said, "Who are you?" [My Bible has an exclamation point there, does yours? “Whoa! There’s a woman lying at my feet!”]
And she answered, "I am Ruth, your servant. Spread your wings over your servant, for you are a redeemer.” (vv. 1–9)
Now, culturally, some of this feels a little bit foreign. I think we’re going to miss some of the nuances of what’s happening here. But I have a question for us.
Scripture doesn’t tell us the answer; we just have to go with our gut. Was Naomi being manipulative in this situation? What do you think, Portia?
Gayle: Wow, that is a loaded question!
Portia: “Manipulative” is such a hard word; what about “shrewd”?
Erin: Do you like “shrewd” better? You think she was being shrewd.
Portia: I mean, kind of, sort of.
Erin: She was being shrewd. What do you think, Gayle? Would you say that Naomi was trying to manipulate the situation at all?
Gayle: Possibly. It was a hard thing to ask. They must have had an incredible relationship in order for her to feel the freedom to ask Ruth to do this very hard thing.
Erin: Yes. At a minimum she had a plan. She gives us her heart motivation here in verse 1, “My daughter [which, that’s interesting], should I not seek rest for you, that it may be well with you?” So, I don’t know, I could go either way. I tend to think of manipulation as being something we do for ourselves, we try and control the situation for ourselves.
She’s seemingly thinking of Ruth here, so I don’t know, but Ruth’s role seems so much more passive and trusting to me.
Gayle: Oh, my goodness! Can you imagine!?
Erin: No! I would have a hard time with this request from anybody, including my mother-in-law. It was like, “Go and do these things, go visit this man; lay down at his feet, uncover his feet.” But Ruth just essentially says, “Okay.”
Portia: I think it’s amazing how she yields to Naomi’s wisdom, even though this seems weird. She’s like, “Okay, this is what you’re asking, and you are an older wiser woman. I’m going to trust what you’re saying and honor that.” That’s kind of what pops out at me.
Erin: I hadn’t thought of that. But let’s remind ourselves, is Ruth an Israelite? No, she’s a Moabite. So, even as we may struggle with the cultural nuances, she probably did, too, because some of this is just rooted in tradition.
Today’s conversation might feel a little clunky; I’m okay with clunky. We’re trying to figure out: when do we move, when do we not? When do we rest in God’s plan and just be still, or when do we (in Naomi’s case) take very specific action? When do we (like in Ruth’s case) submit to somebody else and just go with it?
When do we wait for God to move; when do we take a step of obedience? Wouldn’t it be nice if there was a checklist. “When this happens, you do it this way. When this happens, you do it that way.” But that’s not how it happens. Can you think of some examples in your own lives, or women you know, of that wrestling match.
Knowing when to make a move and when to trust the Lord; when to just sit and be still and when to take a step of obedience. Does anything come to mind for either of you?
Portia: Yes, for me professionally, by trade I am a non-profit professional. I’ve been the executive director of an Artspace, non-profit. There has just been a struggle of, “Is it time to put this down and move in a different direction?” I want God to give me a detailed play-by-play: “This is what you do next.”
A lot of times it just doesn’t work that way. You move in faithful obedience not really knowing what’s next or how somebody may respond or what that outcome may be. You’re just trusting that God is literally ordering your steps.
Erin: Yes, and one step at a time, not a leap at a time, often. What’s that verse about God’s Word being a lamp unto our path? (see Psalm 119:105) You don’t get to see real far ahead. Gayle, can you think of an example of a time when you’ve wrestled? “Do I move, do I wait; do I be quiet, do I be bold?”
Gayle: Well, I’m going to say a really hard word, and that is submission to my husband. That still comes up. We’ve been married fifty-six years.
Erin: Oh, I was hoping there is a point where that gets really easy!
Gayle: No, I am sorry, there is not. My husband will tell you this: He has a pioneer spirit, so he’s excited about the next thing! I struggle with that, because I nest. I like where I am at the time. So we’ve gone through this several times.
Now, I will tell you that when my husband gets an idea, outwardly I may be exemplifying submission, but in my heart I’m wrestling, and it’s hard! However, my husband knows by now that if he tells me, “I’ve been laboring in prayer about this decision, and this is what the Lord has shown me through His Word and His Spirit,” I’m all in.
What I notice about this passage is, it doesn’t say that Naomi was laboring in prayer before the Lord. She just told Ruth to do it, and Ruth did it! That was a source of conviction to me.
Erin: Yes, we have to read through the lines, because very soon before this we see Naomi saying things about the Lord that seem to express a weak faith. So unless a lot has happened in the chapter, we don’t know if she has taken this to the Lord.
I think for me, I am a wild stallion of a person. I will just run into everything! To mix my metaphors, those rams on the National Geographic channel, that just like smash heads, that’s a pretty good picture for me, spiritually. I’m like, “Let’s just get it on! Let’s just fight it out!”
I think stillness is always required first for me. It’s that laboring in prayer, it’s the Lord kind of breaking me . . . in the best way. Like: “Sit down! Don’t race into action first.” But then, knowing when it’s okay to move isn’t always easy for me. I have to be still very, very often, because in my flesh I would run right into it.
Let’s revisit verses 6 and 7 real quick. Portia, can you give us Ruth 3, verses 6 and 7?
Portia: Alright!
So she went down to the threshing floor and did just as her mother-in-law had [commanded] her. And when Boaz had eaten and drunk and his heart was merry, he went to lie down at the end of the heap of grain. Then [Ruth] came softly and uncovered his feet and lay down.
Erin: Okay, what I see in Ruth at every juncture of this book is humility. Humility! Where have we seen it so far? Think all the way back to chapter 1; they’re going down the road. Naomi says, “Daughters-in-law, go on.” Orpah makes one decision; Ruth makes a different decision. How do we see humility enter there? Gayle, what do you think?
Gayle: Ruth is putting herself aside and meeting the needs of her mother-in-law.
Erin: Right. Without knowing what that was going to cost her! I imagine, from the close-up view of that, she might have thought, Well, this may mean I never marry, I may never have children of my own.
Gayle: Because, obviously, they knew the tradition of the next in line . . . or whatever. She also knew that Naomi was too old to bear children.
Erin: Naomi didn’t lie about any of that. She was like, “Listen, I’ve got nothing for you!” So we see humility there. We see humility where Naomi gives Ruth this very elaborate, weird plan to go to Boaz on the threshing floor. And then, in her approach to Boaz . . . Portia, how do you see humility in her approach?
Portia: There is such gentleness. When I read the text, I often pay attention to the adjectives. So where it says, “. . . then she came softly and uncovered his feet.”
Erin: “Softly.”
Portia: Yes. I’m like, God is intentional about His Word. There is just such a meekness and a gentleness that kind of leaps off the pages at me.
Erin: Yes, she doesn’t demand, which in some ways she could have. Boaz was in line as a kinsman redeemer. But she goes in, and it’s a soft approach. Some translations of these verses use the word “handmaid” to describe her.
I once heard a momma pray—she had a lot of daughters, I can’t remember how many—she committed to pray that all of her daughters would be handmaids in the kingdom of God. That so impacted me. I only have sons, but I want them to be servants, and I want the women they marry to be handmaids.
But this is the picture we get of Ruth, this willingness to serve, to do for others. She did not demand that he fulfill his obligations, which is an extreme posture of humility and a beautiful picture of how we come to Christ . . . without much to offer.
So, I want to talk about Jesus. I want to talk about how we came to know Him and what He means in our lives. (I know we could all gush and gush and gush about what Jesus has done in our lives!). But, Portia, how did you come to know the Lord?
Portia: Well, I grew up in a Christian environment. My grandmother and mom were the church pianist and organist, so I’ve been in church all my life. But I think developing that intimate, personal, real relationship with Christ came later on in life during my young adult years. I think that’s a time where we’re all like, “Lord, help me! I don’t know what I’m doing with my life!”
I was literally just crying out for guidance and direction, and “Lord, help me!” One night, I had gotten my first “big girl” job, and I would come home and read my Bible. I was sitting on the floor of my apartment reading the book of Galatians . . . and just the beauty!
The Holy Spirit had already been priming my heart. But it was something about walking through that book that completely changed my life. There was such a freeness and a newness and just really seeing Christ as an infinite Treasure. It just changed my life!
Erin: Gayle, how did you come to know the Lord?
Gayle: I think I was around five years old, and I had godly parents who led us in family devotions every night after dinner. Apparently, that night, the Scripture must have pertained to hell, and I asked my older sister about that, because I didn’t want to go there!
And, as older sisters do, she said that’s where I was headed! I was the only family member [on that course] at that point. I wanted Jesus! She led me in a prayer of salvation, and my fear of hell went away at that point. However, when I got older, I realized that Jesus needed to be Lord of my life, so that was my story.
Erin: Well, I know enough about your stories to know that they would be pictures like that of Ruth, that softness with which Ruth came to Boaz. Mine is not like that. I came to Jesus kicking and screaming, which will not surprise you, if you know me. I’m fond of saying, “Kicking and screaming obedience is still obedience!”—for which I’m grateful!
I was a brokenhearted teenager and came to the Lord. Now I’m just a brokenhearted non-teenager!—but the Lord is changing me, is transforming me.
This is one of the first places in the book of Ruth where I think we see a really clear gospel parallel. She comes to Boaz aware of her need, and that’s what we must do to come to Jesus. We must realize the end of ourselves and our need for Him. Let’s look at verse 9. What does Ruth ask Boaz to do? Gayle, can you read us Ruth 3:9?
Gayle: Yes.
“Who are you?’ he asked. "I am your servant Ruth," she said. "Spread the corner of your garment over me, since you are a kinsman-redeemer.” (NIV84)
Erin: I love that! My version says, “Spread your wings over your servant, for you are a redeemer.” (ESV) Again, we get this picture of the gospel in this interaction between Ruth and Boaz! I want to take us to some prophets here for a minute. Gayle, we’re going to have you flip to Ezekiel. Portia, I’m going to have you flip to Isaiah.
Gayle, if you can read us Ezekiel 16:8–14, I think we’re going to see some very clear parallels between what happened here on the threshing floor and what the Lord does for us.
Gayle: Okay.
“Later I passed by, and when I looked at you and saw that you were old enough for love, I spread the corner of my garment over you and covered your nakedness. I gave you my solemn oath and entered into a covenant with you,’"declares the Sovereign Lord, "and you became mine.
"I bathed you with water and washed the blood from you and put ointments on you. I clothed you with an embroidered dress and put sandals of fine leather on you. I dressed you in fine linen and covered you with costly garments. I adorned you with jewelry: I put bracelets on your arms and a necklace around your neck and I put a ring on your nose, earrings on your ears and a beautiful crown on your head. So you were adorned with gold and silver; your clothes were of fine linen and costly fabric and embroidered cloth. Your food was fine flour, honey and olive oil.
“You became very beautiful and rose to be a queen. And your fame spread among the nations on account of your beauty, because the splendor I had given you made your beauty perfect," declares the Sovereign Lord. (NIV84)
Oh my goodness, that is beautiful!
Erin: This is a beautiful picture of salvation! We were naked; our sin left us exposed! And your Bible uses the exact same language there as the Ruth story, and mine does, too. Yours says, “I spread my garment over you.” Mine says, “I covered you with my wings.”
It’s this idea of the covering of our sin; we see it here in this prophetic book. We see it in the book of Ruth, and it’s pointing us forward to the gospel. Portia, can you read us Isaiah 61:10?
Portia: Absolutely!
I will greatly rejoice in the Lord; my soul shall exult in my God, for he has clothed me with [His] garments of salvation; he has covered me with the robe of righteousness, as a bridegroom decks himself like a priest with a beautiful headdress, and as a bride adorns herself with her jewels.
Erin: Good. Portia, I know one of the things you love to do is connecting the dots in Scripture. Here we see these three passages that parallel so beautifully and point us toward the gospel. It reminds me of a story.
I had a friend, she was a follower of Christ, but she just had anxiety about it. She just wasn’t sure. So she prayed and asked the Lord, “Would You just show me that I’m Yours?” And she had a dream that night (that’s biblical, the Lord is speaking in dreams) and a white robe fell out of the sky. She put her arms up and it fell on her, and it fit her perfectly! And she thought, From that moment on, I just knew.
This is what these verses are describing. Him clothing us in robes of righteousness, taking our nakedness and putting us in beautiful clothes! That’s what Boaz does for Ruth! Oh, this is a romance story, but it’s more than a romance story between Boaz and Ruth.
I’ve just made a commitment that any time I teach the Bible. I make sure the women listening can articulate the gospel. Here we are with our Bibles open, so I’d love to hear it. Whether we’ve known the gospel twenty years or two minutes, t’s still good for us to remember what it is. Portia, what is the gospel?
Portia: I think it’s Christ taking our filthy rags, our brokenness—I would say, our “hot mess”—clothing us in beauty, in perfection, in righteousness. I get a little choked up, a little misty, thinking about it. We deserve hell, we deserve death, and what Christ has given us is something that we would never be able to attain for ourselves.
As a person who struggled so in my younger years . . . I struggled so much with legalism, and I think you and I have talked about this before. I’d say one day, “Okay, I had a good day! I didn’t say any bad words. I prayed for everybody. Oh great! I’m going to heaven today!”
And then the next day, I would totally blow it. “Oh, I’m going to bust hell wide open!” I would live in this whole vacillating between two extremes, thinking that it was me that I had to be my savior.
Erin: That’s exhausting!
Portia: Yes, it is so exhausting! It reminds me of what the psalmist says in Psalm 119:113 about being double-minded. Because you are going from one extreme to the next. I think that was the beauty when I read the book of Galatians that night. It was that fresh reminder. I had fresh eyes to see that I am free in Christ!
It’s not circumcision; it was not being raised in the Missionary Baptist Church; it was not having a mama and a grandma who were the church musicians. It was all Christ! From start to finish, all Christ!
Erin: Yes. John Newton, the author of the hymn of the hymn Amazing Grace, said, “I am a great sinner, and Christ is a great Savior!” That’s it! That’s the gospel! That passage you read us, Gayle, it goes on and on and on and on and on about that robe and the rings and the nose rings . . . because that’s what we get in Christ!
So as women are listening to this season of the Women of the Bible, I hope they’ll take a moment (maybe right here, mid-episode) and just remind each other what the gospel is. Because, spoiler alert!, the book of Ruth is about the gospel, and you’ve got to know what you’re looking for.
We don’t have to wait for God to respond when we turn to Him. He’s right there! That’s what I remember about the night I gave my heart to Jesus in a very hot auditorium filled with a lot of people, is that He was right there.
But sometimes we do have to wait in other areas of our lives. Take us back to that thought of the spiritual wiggles. I’m going to read us Ruth 3:18 very quickly. Ruth has the encounter with Boaz, Boaz sends her home. Let’s read this whole story. He sends her home with some gifts of grain. And then in verse 18, she tells her mother-in-law about it.
Naomi replied: “Wait, my daughter, until you learn how the matter turns out, for the man will not rest but will settle the matter today.” You know that was a long wait! Ruth encountered Boaz (who I imagine to be very handsome!) He’s sweet to her, and he gives her gifts. Then Naomi says, “Just wait.”
I see a change in Naomi’s tone here; do you all sense it? “Just wait, my daughter, until you learn how the matter will turn out.” Doesn’t Jesus win us back over and over and over with His faithfulness?
Portia: Absolutely!
Erin: At one point, Naomi thinks God is dealing harshly with her, and then we see her at rest.
God just woos us over and over. Sometimes obedience equals action, and sometimes it means stillness. I want us to rapid-fire several verses about waiting on the Lord.
And do not turn off the podcast at this moment, because these waiting-on-the-Lord verses can be a little hard to sit under. But I want us to consider what Scripture says. Who’s got Psalm 46:10?
Portia: I do. “Be still, and know that I am God. I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!”
Erin: Yes. Does anybody else have trouble with “Be still and know that I am God”? Those spiritual wiggles? Gayle, can you read us 1 Samuel 12:16?
Gayle: “Now then, stand still and see this great thing the Lord is about to do before your eyes!” (NIV) Exclamation mark!
Erin: Stand still and watch the Lord do a great thing! I love that! And I’ve got a very famous passage, Psalm 23:2: “He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters.” And that “makes me” part? That’s there for Erin Davis! It’s like, “You’re gonna lay down beside these still waters . . . and you’re gonna wait!” (laughter)
But it’s such a picture! I don’t know exactly how we know when to be still and when to take action. What are some tools in your own toolboxes when you’re trying to figure that out, “When am I supposed to just be still and when am I supposed to move?” Portia?
Portia: Honestly, I will just take time and just sit in the Scriptures. I feel like God is always leading me to specific passages, I don’t know about anybody else. Recently, I’ve been wrestling with some decisions that I need to make. I’m like, “Okay, Lord, just show me.” And I will be led to a passage that I may not have read in years, or just a specific book that I have read through, but not intently studied. Then God is like, “Let me take you here and show you.” He literally guides me; He shows me, “This is what I want you to do. I want you to just chill” sometimes. Or if it’s time to take action, He leads me through His Word and shows me, “Get up and move, and do this.”
Erin: Gayle, when you’re wrestling with whether to sit or to move, what are some of the tools in your toolbox?
Gayle: Well, we have an amazing Holy Spirit Who tells me when to put the brakes on and rest and when to take action. Honestly, I couldn’t do this life without that! My life verse is Philippians 2:13, “For it is God working in you, both to will and to do of His good pleasure” (paraphrase). And that gives me the assurance that when I’m resting. He’s at work. And I love that!
Erin: I’ve got a throng of wise women who deserve so much credit for what happens in my life. Those are the places I turn—I can think of several—when I’m like the inside of a washing machine! I’m just so churned up. I don’t know. They can look at it and go, “Do this, or don’t do this, Erin.” And so, I think they deserve such credit!
We did see Naomi come back into a tribe of women, and who knows what influence they had in the settling of her heart. I want to read us one of my favorite passages. I know I say that about all of them, but I really do feel that way about this one, Psalm 131:2.
But I have calmed and quieted my soul, like a weaned child with its mother; like a weaned child is my soul within me.
I have four boys, and when they were not weaned, they were very wiggly, because they wanted to eat. But once they were weaned, they could just snuggle into Momma’s lap, because I was no longer their source of milk. We could just snuggle. And that’s the picture the psalmist is giving us here, of being with the Lord.
You can just snuggle in, and you don’t have to have anything at that moment because you’re content. I love, love, love that picture! For me, it’s sitting in the presence of God and with the Word of God. Those things just still me right down!
So, as we’re wrapping up this session, right now, right where you are, I think you could just ask the Lord to get the wiggles out of you. If there’s a situation you’re wanting to claw your way out of or you’re wanting to control or you’re wanting to try and force God’s hand to move (we can’t, but you want to), just ask the Lord to help you get out the wiggles and to rest in Him like a weaned child in the lap of his mother!
If you want to experience more of that peace with the Lord (and who doesn’t?), let me encourage you to pick up your copy of Ruth.
This is a six-week Bible study that is going to walk you through this book. You’re going to interact with the Scripture and dig deeper into the things we’re talking about. You can grab your copy—or maybe grab a bunch of copies for you and some friends—at ReviveOurHearts.com/Ruth.
That’s also where you can find this conversation on video. I know you’re wondering, What do those girls look like. What are they wearing?! Well, you can watch us on video.
It is time to say goodbye! Portia, I know ladies are going to want to hear more of that beautiful voice of yours! Where do they learn more about you?
Portia: You can visit my website www.PortiaCollins.com, or you can also visit www.SheShallBeCalled.com. This is a women’s ministry dedicated to promoting Bible literacy among women. There are a ton of resources and podcasts and blogs—just the whole kit ’n kaboodle!
Erin: Portia and I think we are sisters separated at birth, because we both have that deep, deep love for women knowing the Bible. And I love that name, She Shall Be Called!
Gayle, you have been with the ministry of Revive Our Hearts for a long time.
Gayle: A very long time!
Erin: So you are the right one to tell us more about Revive Our Hearts. If somebody’s listening and they want to learn more about Revive Our Hearts, where do they go? And tell us a little bit about what Revive Our Hearts does.
Gayle: Please go to ReviveOurHearts.com. There is so much information there and many resources that anyone can use to get deeper in the Word. We have podcasts and daily programs. Radio has gone crazy in the last twenty years that I’ve been in the area! We also have conferences. Go to the website, check it out. And we’re international now!
Erin: We are! I don’t know how many languages we’re in, because it’s growing all the time. I hope that women are listening to this podcast globally. You can head to ReviveOurHearts.com, and you’ll find more resources in Portuguese and more resources in Spanish and then Farsi. It’s all right there for you!
All Scripture is taken from the ESV unless noted.