I was totally taken off guard by Lacy’s blatant attacks on my beliefs. Apparently she had heard about my perspectives and beliefs on God’s design for women, and she was not impressed. She was annoyed. She was offended. During our back and forth debate, I was extremely uncomfortable. I wasn’t sure how to counter Lacy’s arguments, and I was a little insecure about my stance. I felt like Lacy was demeaning and attacking God’s design for womanhood. Honestly, I was at a loss for words to defend what I believed. Looking back on that conversation, I now realize that Lacy had many misconceptions about what God’s Word says about womanhood. Unfortunately, I was unequipped to back up my beliefs, and Lacy left no better off than where she had started. That conversation inspired me to dig deeper and learn how to back up what I believe. My prayer is that these ten common misconceptions about God’s design for women will open your eyes to the truth and equip you to better share it with others around you.
Ten Common Misconceptions About Biblical Womanhood
1. Biblical womanhood is about being a doormat.
When the topics of womanhood and the Bible are brought up together, this idea that the Bible paints women as doormats is usually in the mix. But this idea simply isn’t supported by Scripture. Absolutely nowhere in the Bible will you find God encouraging a “doormat” mentality among men or women. Think of Esther, Rahab, Ruth, Mary (the mother of Jesus), Abigail, and many more. These women are held up as examples of godly, beautiful women, and they are anything but doormats. They are smart, hardworking, talented, gifted, and gutsy women all striving to honor God with their lives. Esther approached the king unannounced and risked her life to save the Jews. Rahab risked her life to help the Israelites conquer the city. Ruth selflessly followed her mother-in-law to a foreign land and worked hard to support her. Mary put her life at risk by accepting the dangerous responsibility of bringing Jesus into the world. Abigail wisely negotiated with David and saved her husband from being killed.
2. Godly women are wimpy.
The more I learn about God’s design for me, the more I realize it takes a seriously strong woman to live like He calls us to. It’s easy to go with the flow and drift with the cultural current. It’s hard to resist the trends and the modern ideas for womanhood and stick to God’s Word and His truth.
Women who truly live out God’s design are some of the bravest and strongest women I know.
Women who truly live out God’s design are some of the bravest and strongest women I know. They are willing to swim against the current and stand alone. Biblical womanhood isn’t for the faint of heart. Biblical womanhood is for brave women who are willing to fight for truth and embrace God’s Word!
3. The Bible describes women as less than.
Whoever started this whole notion that women are less than men obviously didn’t read the Bible. The Bible absolutely and completely supports the idea that men and women are created equal. Neither one is more valuable. They are equally valuable but purposely different. God created man and woman to each fulfill a unique purpose on earth. Different doesn’t mean less than. I challenge you to search Scripture and see how God talks about women. I also challenge you to look through the New Testament and notice the way Jesus treated women. He often went against the cultural norm and treated women with care and respect. He spoke to them compassionately and treated them with value.
4. Biblical womanhood requires throwing your brain away.
One of the reasons I wrote Girl Defined: God’s Radical Design for Beauty, Femininity, and Identity was to show women their immense value and purpose. In the book I take you into the lives of four different women in different seasons of life, each using their lives to live out biblical womanhood and glorify God. In no way have these women checked their brains at the door. If you are truly living your life with a Christ-centered purpose and eternal mindset, you will need all the brains God has given you to think counter-culturally.
5. Biblical womanhood is for homebodies.
Many women seem to have gone to one of two extremes:
- They idolize the home and assume that if they are inside of it they are honoring God.
- They despise the home and assume if they are outside of it they are successful.
Neither is the right option. We need to get our hearts right and remember the bigger purpose for why we do what we do. The home is important, but it’s not the home that matters most—it’s the people within the home. We take care of our home to bless our family. We use our home to build relationships, inviting people inside to foster community. Our homes are a tool we use to honor and glorify God.
6. Biblical womanhood is about marriage.
I’ve seen girls idolize marriage as the be all and end all, and I’ve seen girls reject and embrace total independence from men. Both are wrong mindsets. We are here on a kingdom mission. God has given us His instruction manual on how we as women can best honor Him. God created marriage as a means for us to better serve Him as a team. He created it for companionship, for reproducing, for pleasure, and as a way for us to represent the gospel. Marriage is beautiful, but the purpose of marriage is to point to Someone greater.
7. Godly women dress old-fashioned.
Drabby clothes. No makeup. Unstylish hair. These may be the images some of you think of when you hear the words “biblical womanhood.” I’ve got great news for you! That’s a total misconception. Some of the most godly, Christ-centered women I know are also some of the most beautiful. Being a biblical woman isn’t about being old-fashioned. Biblical womanhood is about dressing in a way that best represents and honors the purity and holiness of Christ. For more about modesty, check out this video on modesty that my sisters and I created.
8. Biblical womanhood is boring.
Life begins to take on a whole new meaning when you live in light of Christ and the gospel.
The more that I’ve strived to live out biblical womanhood, the more exciting my life has become. God is so full of amazing surprises, and living for Him is one adventurous journey. Living out God’s plan for womanhood provides a greater vision for life than I could have dreamed up for myself. Everything takes on a greater purpose. Everything becomes about the kingdom. Think about it:
- Instead of just going to the grocery store and grabbing groceries, you have the opportunity to build relationships and share the hope and purpose of the gospel.
- Instead of just choosing clothes to draw attention to yourself, we get to dress in a way that points others to Christ.
- Instead of just raising kids to grow up and become independent, you have the care of souls and are given the privilege to disciple them.
- Instead of living for ourselves, we live to honor the God of the universe!
Life begins to take on a whole new meaning when you live in light of Christ and the gospel.
9. Biblical womanhood is about doing dishes and scrubbing toilets.
Y’all. Really? Where did this even come from? Yes, there are daily tasks that need to be done (to the glory of God of course), but biblical womanhood is about so much more than this. Remember that your living space is a tool for you to nurture relationships, to reproduce life (physically and spiritually), and to care for those around you. Scrub those toilets and wash those dishes, but don’t lose sight of the why behind the scrubbing: to love, bless, and disciple those God has placed in your sphere of influence.
10. My womanhood is about me.
We need to take our eyes off of ourselves. Life isn’t about us. Biblical womanhood isn’t about us. The more Christ becomes greater in our eyes and we become less, the easier this topic will seem. We need to remove ourselves from the equation and remember that it’s all about Christ. Biblical womanhood is about living all in for Christ and using your one life to make an impact for eternity. It’s about making disciples, sharing the gospel, loving the Lord with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength, following God’s Word, and doing your best to reflect Christ as a female. Wrapping it up Which of these common misconceptions have you been deceived by? How does God’s Word debunk the lies you’ve believed about biblical womanhood?