I had a long phone conversation with a young friend of mine. She's a senior in college and a follower of Christ. A young man had recently begun courting her and had even gotten her father's permission. Though both were Christians, it wasn't long before my friend and her boyfriend entered into sexual sin. Their relationship started unraveling, and my friend didn't know how to feel or what to do. Her boyfriend wouldn't even return her texts. Her head and heart were swirling with shame and guilt and rejection and pain. She had known better. What now? Dear sisters, the reason our heavenly Father gives us rules and boundaries is not to keep us from the things that would make us happy. His commands are our protection; they show His love for us. Do you really believe that? Do you really believe God loves you, or do you think He's withholding good from you? Sin always brings suffering. The enemy tells us we'll be able to manage sin or that God will forgive us, so it doesn't really matter if we disobey Him. He tells us we'll be able to stop whenever we want. He lies to us. I know this from personal experience. Sin is a snare, a trap. Once you step in it and it clamps shut, you can't remove it. You're helpless against it. But Jesus isn't helpless against it. And He isn't surprised that you've fallen prey to the enemy's lies or to the temptation of your own flesh. You are still precious to Him. If you've fallen into sexual sin or are considering that temptation, here's what I'd like for you to do.
1. Pour your heart out to God. Find a quiet place and tell Him everything.
2. Seek out an older Christian woman you can trust. Pour your heart out to her, and ask her to pray for you.
Tell her everything. This is a biblical prescription for healing. Will you be courageous enough to follow it?
3. Ask this woman for godly advice.
Where did you go wrong? What wrong thoughts of God did you have that made you vulnerable? What situations were you allowing yourself to be in that made this sin possible? What steps do you need to take to stay safe in the future? Ask her to help you walk in the light.
4. Believe that you are loved.
Our sin takes us by surprise, but it doesn't surprise our Savior. He is the friend of sinners. He came to rescue us. There is no condemnation for those who are hidden in Him. Will you trust Him enough to throw yourself into His arms? I pray that you will.