Lord, I’m frustrated in ministry. Serving You feels burdensome and is harder than I expected it to be. I’m getting older, yet working harder than everyone else and pulling more of the load as I hustle from one task to another. I can’t keep up this pace. The joy I once had as a leader is gone. Is it time to quit?
Resentment had been steadily building in Laurie’s heart. Between the demands at home following her husband’s surgery and her responsibilities at church, she was at a breaking point. Laurie struggled to focus and was growing impatient with the people around her. In the past, she enjoyed serving with her ministry team, but now she retreats into her shell. Head down. She tells herself to “get the work done.” Thoughts of quitting consume her mind.
Her story isn’t unusual. Perhaps it sounds familiar? Somewhere along the way, women serving in ministry can lose their bearings. We wonder what changed and how we arrived at this state of delusion. There are likely several contributing factors, but Laurie’s frustration makes clear that she’s been deceived by lies about God and ministry. She falsely believed:
- Ministry shouldn’t be hard.
- God isn’t giving me what I need.
- I’m too old and tired to serve God.
These statements sound truthful, don’t they? In reality, they are beautifully-packaged lies, hand-delivered by Satan. Like Eve, Laurie listened to the lies, dwelled on their message without questioning, believed them without praying, and then took the fatal bite. Friend, I don’t want you to fall into the same seductive trap, so let’s dissect these lies, send them packing, and replace them with what God says is true.
1. Ministry shouldn’t be hard.
If we had our way, every ministry initiative would be golden, every seat in Bible study would be filled with women hungry for the Word, and every woman in the church would participate (without one complaint!). No one would feel left out, unseen, or unknown.
If only it were possible! We are sinners leading sinners, so ministry will never be easy. Eve doubted, Sarah laughed, Miriam was jealous, Rachel was idolatrous, Naomi was bitter, Martha was stressed-out, Euodia and Syntyche couldn’t make peace. God sanctifies us through the struggles of ministry.
When ministry feels more like tribulation than triumph, I ask the Lord what He wants to teach me instead of focusing on how to escape it. Every hardship exists under His watchful, loving eye. He graciously gives perseverance. God alone knows what blessing or hardship I need to reflect the beauty of Christ.
The real truth is that God is more interested in shaping us than using us. He uses our struggles in ministry to make us weak and to underscore how much we need Him. Frustration in ministry is a camouflaged gift if it makes us more desperate for God. The promised rewards make it worth the pain:
Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ. (Colossians 3:23–24 ESV)
For the Son of Man is going to come with his angels in the glory of his Father, and then he will repay each person according to what he has done. (Matthew 16:27 ESV)
2. God isn’t giving me what I need.
This is another lie from the Devil that was first pitched and adopted by Eve. If ministry isn’t running smoothly, we wonder if God is holding out on us. Aren’t we automatically entitled to His blessings while we’re working so hard?
It’s a snare inflicted by Satan when we get tangled up in what we don’t have. We lack enough resources, enough help, enough time, enough appreciation, enough participation, enough talent. Everywhere we turn we can come up empty-handed. Feeling overlooked by God makes us ungrateful for what we do have. Bitterness and resentment take root in our hearts as we saw in Laurie’s story.
Believing this lie makes Peter out to be a fibber. He wrote, “[God’s] divine power has given us everything required for life and godliness through the knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness” (2 Peter 1:3).
If we don’t have enough for ministry, may I share an observation? It’s quite possible that we’ve forgotten how to abide. The joy of abiding is drawing living water from the deep well of God’s truth. It’s sitting in His presence daily, listening and receiving His gracious gifts of wisdom, peace, and truth. Everything we need for ministry flows from God’s presence.
Amazingly, God wants to abide with sinful humans—yet it’s often the one thing we resist or rush through so we can move on to our agendas. Have you detached from the Vine? Is it time to return?
The truth is, God gives us everything we need (and more).
Deposit these nuggets of truth into your heart:
And my God will supply all your needs according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 4:19)
Young lions lack food and go hungry, but those who seek the LORD will not lack any good thing. (Psalm 34:10)
3. I’m too old and tired to serve God.
Try telling this lie to Abraham and Sarah or to Anna and Simeon. Even though I’ve migrated over to Medicare, I don’t believe in retiring from serving the Lord. There are plenty of days that I feel too old and tired, but I won’t all-out quit. I accept that ministry looks different as I physically slow down and that I lack the mental clarity I once had. There is a right time to make room for younger leaders and move our emphasis from leading to legacy. But as I’ve said before, aborting the race shouldn’t be an option for Christ followers (Heb. 12:1–3).
I’m urged to keep running by my friend Barbara who moved into an assisted living facility at age ninety and promptly started a Bible study. She spends hours interceding for others. Or another friend, Susan, who continues writing books and speaking well into her eighties. Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth is currently undertaking one of the greatest assignments of her life to record 260 new podcast episodes teaching through the Bible from Genesis to Revelation. These women are my superheroes. They elegantly display God’s grace to provide the spiritual and physical stamina necessary to keep going.
Isaiah reassures our concerns about aging in 40: 29–31,
He gives strength to the faint
and strengthens the powerless.
Youths may become faint and weary,
and young men stumble and fall,
but those who trust in the LORD
will renew their strength;
they will soar on wings like eagles;
they will run and not become weary,
they will walk and not faint.
And in 46:3–4,
“Listen to me, house of Jacob,
all the remnant of the house of Israel,
who have been sustained from the womb,
carried along since birth.
I will be the same until your old age,
and I will bear you up when you turn gray.
I have made you, and I will carry you;
I will bear and rescue you.
The truth is that serving God is a lifelong calling. We will never become too tired or too old unless we want to. Common sense adjustments need to be made during the latter years but let’s exhort one another to finish strong—not frustrated.
If I could speak to Laurie, I would tell her of the tragic mistake of withdrawing into herself with the declaration “head down; get the work done.” I know because I’ve done it myself. Satan’s big guns are discouragement and isolation. We must speak truth to each other to cut through the barbwire of lies. We desperately need the Church. Truly, there is little flourishing apart from the Body.
I’ve discovered an age-defying secret: friendships with younger women in ministry blow fresh wind into my sails. This wind gusts both ways. Older women are uniquely equipped to offer wise counsel gleaned from a lifetime of loving and living God’s Word to our younger sisters.
Breaking Free to Serve
In the spiritual kingdom, our work is aggressively opposed by a counter kingdom. As our ministries chip away at the darkness of the Evil One, he applies both heat and pressure. He is the father of lies who relentlessly creates havoc and discord within our ministry teams and within our own hearts. Satan’s tactic is to detract our eyes from Jesus. He maliciously tries to steal the fruit from our leadership.
Through the power of God’s unchanging Word, Satan won’t win. He can’t. Jesus is the declared victor. Laurie heard the truth about her situation and her misguided thoughts from a Bible teacher. The scales fell off. Her eyes were opened to the lies she was believing. In repentance and faith, she turned to her Savior for forgiveness and renewal. She took up the baton of truth and has been set free to serve with fresh vigor. When God’s truth sets you free, you are finally free! What lies are you believing?
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