She disappeared somewhere between Spring Break and the beginning of summer, reemerging in our Sunday Bible study on a morning I wasn’t expecting to see her. Just as I leaned across the table to ask how she’d been doing, the lesson began. I watched her, half-listening to the teacher and mostly hoping we’d have a moment to talk.
A few minutes later, a slide with discussion points provided an opportunity for her to share the answers to some of my questions. She began telling the table about all that was filling her schedule and why she’d been absent for a while. Then she pivoted to the topic at hand. We were supposed to be discussing Mark 1:16–20 (where Jesus calls His disciples) and then addressing what keeps us from fully following Him.
“I don’t know where to find time,” she told us. “I have a job, I’m busy on weekends, and I’m sort of seeing this guy. How do you add church to all of that? My life is already so full, and I can’t—” she cut herself off before she could finish, but my mind filled in the rest:
I can’t find time to follow Jesus.
Leaving Nets Behind
Our class had been studying the disciples’ urgent response to Jesus’ invitation to an entirely new way of living:
As he passed alongside the Sea of Galilee, he saw Simon and Andrew, Simon’s brother, casting a net into the sea—for they were fishermen. “Follow me,” Jesus told them, “and I will make you fish for people.” Immediately they left their nets and followed him. Going on a little farther, he saw James the son of Zebedee and his brother John in a boat putting their nets in order. Immediately he called them, and they left their father Zebedee in the boat with the hired men and followed him. (Mark 1:16–20)
As our teacher walked through those verses, he noted that the disciples had been called to a new mission and a new identity. They left behind old nets, and they were also expected to leave behind their old lifestyles. They would not only be followers; they’d become part of the family of God, transformed by His work in their hearts. Their lives would no longer be run by their selfish desires but by the commands of King Jesus.
As the teacher began to wrap up the lesson, he paraphrased Philippians 3:8, and I jotted it down: “Everything is loss compared to the worth of following Jesus.”
The worth of following Jesus.
Jesus was too valuable for the disciples to not give up all they had. His value seemed to be the piece my friend was missing. She had been thinking about what it would be like to try to add Jesus to her life, and to her He seemed to be too big to try to fit in. But the problem wasn’t that her view of Jesus was too big. The problem was that her view of Him was still too small.
The disciples saw that Jesus was not just a man but the Son of God. Mark 1 says they responded to Him “immediately” when He called: they reoriented their careers, their free time, their friendships, and every element of their ordinary existence to His ways. The enormity of His life changed every detail of theirs.
Following and Failure
In the months since that Sunday morning, my friend has disappeared from class once again, and I’ve moved from the Gospel narratives to spending time in the book of Acts. This time through, I’ve read with the discussion from that day still echoing in my head.
The men who were called in Mark 1 (and Matthew 4, Luke 5, and John 1) had walked with Jesus and seen what His obedience to God the Father had cost Him. They had heard the crowds, seen the scars, and knew better than others what following His example would likely mean for their own lives. As eyewitnesses to His life, death, and resurrection, no one knew better than they did: Jesus was worthy to be followed.
When it came down to their priorities, their plans, and the purpose of their entire lives—Jesus was worthy of all of it. But that doesn’t mean that after initially leaving everything (10:28), the disciples didn’t pick up old nets or need to hear Jesus’ voice calling them to follow Him again. That’s clear when you follow the ups and downs of Peter’s journey. (See John 21:1–19.)
Peter is believed to be the major source Mark relied on when he authored his book. This was the same Peter who was the first to confess Jesus as Christ the Messiah (8:29), who declared he’d be the one to never fall away (14:29), and who did just that (14:72). In the shorter ending to the book of Mark, the chapter ends abruptly on resurrection morning with the angel’s message, which includes a special mention of Peter:
“You are looking for Jesus of Nazareth, who was crucified. He has risen! He is not here. See the place where they put him. But go, tell his disciples and Peter, ‘He is going ahead of you to Galilee; you will see him there just as he told you.’” (Mark 16:6–7, emphasis added)
Even after literally walking with Jesus, Peter had failed to follow Him as He deserved. This mention of Peter here which singles him out shows that he was not only forgiven: he was still included in the mission Jesus had given all His disciples.
As the disciples were reunited with Jesus after His resurrection, they got to see Him in the flesh. More than that, the way they lived in response shows they viewed Him in light of all His invisible attributes as well. He was their Lord and Savior, who had conquered death and would reign as King forever.
Seeing the truth of Jesus, Peter believed Him to be worthy of all he had, even his own life (John 21:18–19). He later wrote:
Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. Because of his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead and into an inheritance that is imperishable, undefiled, and unfading, kept in heaven for you. . . .
Though you have not seenhim, you love him; though not seeing him now, you believe in him, and you rejoice with inexpressible and glorious joy, because you are receiving the goal of your faith, the salvation of your souls. (1 Peter 1:3–4, 8–9)
It’s hard to not think about my “missing” friend who heard Jesus’ call years ago and who could use a fresh reminder of His great mercy. You may be in a similar spot. You may have lost sight of what makes Jesus worth following, or you may feel the weight of not following Him as you should. It’s not too late to experience the Lord’s forgiveness and to allow Him to reorient your life in the season to come.
A Call to Refocus
A few weeks ago, I started filling in dates for new Bible studies, small groups, and midweek gatherings starting soon and watched as the majority of my evenings disappeared. That’s when I felt it: that little twinge of anxiety that reappears with the end of summer and the return of fall responsibilities. But as I began to feel stressed over activities that hadn’t kicked off yet and felt tightness in my chest over the limited free time, I could almost feel the Holy Spirit’s nudge. “Hey,” He seemed to whisper, “pay attention to this pressure you’re feeling.”
As I closed out my Google calendar, the Holy Spirit’s initial nudge brought a question to my mind: “How does it feel trying to run your own kingdom?”
At first the problem I was facing with my schedule seemed different than the one my friend had faced. While she couldn’t find time to plug into Christian community, I was overwhelmed by too much of it. I soon began to realize that it’s not just my friend who needs a bigger view of Jesus. I do too.
An Appointment with the King
I recently heard someone say that if a king asks for your time, you change your calendar to meet with him. King Jesus deserves to be at the center of our thoughts and decisions about how we spend our time. When we don’t allow His priorities to shape ours, when we don’t let His perspective guide our days and give us hope and purpose . . . we miss out on the joy and peace and overarching mission that comes with following Him.
You may be entering this fall season feeling like my friend: you don’t think you have the time to fit Christ and Christian community into your incredibly busy life. Or you may be approaching the fall with a schedule that looks more like mine—filled with church activities but lacking the right focus. In either case, stop and pray through the following questions:
- Do I see Jesus as more valuable than anything else in the world, or do I see Him as just another obligation?Lord, open my eyes and help me to truly grasp the depth of Your worth. Grow my love for You more and more, so that I can’t think of anything better than to get to follow You wholeheartedly.
- Are there areas of my life (relationships, career, hobbies) that I prioritize over Jesus? Lord, You know how hard it is for me to let go of these things, but I do not want to be more attached to my current lifestyle than to You. Remind me that You are the source of true life, and anything I hold onto apart from You will leave me empty. Loosen my grip on these things that You’re bringing to mind now, and teach me what it means that nothing compares to having You.
- What would it look like for me to reorient my life to the mission of Jesus this fall?Lord, show me where my time, energy, and resources need to be redirected in light of Your mission. Help me to actively pursue areas where I can grow deeper in my relationship with You and to share Your love with others. Help me to step out in faith and make these changes, even when it feels uncomfortable or costly.
As you address those questions with the Lord, you may find you need to spend time catching a clearer vision of who Jesus is and why He really is worth following. You may need to change some rhythms and routines, asking the Lord to help you to see each one, not as an obligation, but as an opportunity to serve—forgiven and free and at the pleasure of the King. Jesus is too big to try to squeeze into the margins of this season. May this be the year you discover He’s worthy of your all.
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