As I celebrated my first Mother’s Day this year, my expanding belly gave away my status as a mom. I’ve experienced the joys of pregnancy, from the telltale “glow” to the delight of feeling my baby’s movements, and I’ve felt agonizing bouts of morning sickness and the aches and pains that accompany my body adjusting to this new life inside.
My husband, though he’s experienced each stage “with” me, isn’t carrying this baby. He doesn’t receive warm smiles from strangers or questions about how he’s feeling in the same way I do, yet he is just as responsible for this baby. While he’s not showing any visible signs of fatherhood, he is a father—one who is in the process of becoming the dad God created him to be.
This Father’s Day, I want to celebrate him and other new dads as if their role is just as important . . . because it is.
A Godly Foundation
Before I met my husband, I prayed for him in a lot of different ways. Psalm 15 is a place I would frequently turn to as I asked God to make my husband a godly man. This passage fit my hopes for him not only as a husband, but as a father.
Lord, who can dwell in your tent?
Who can live on your holy mountain?The one who lives blamelessly, practices righteousness,
and acknowledges the truth in his heart—
who does not slander with his tongue,
who does not harm his friend
or discredit his neighbor,
who despises the one rejected by the Lord
but honors those who fear the Lord,
who keeps his word whatever the cost,
who does not lend his silver at interest
or take a bribe against the innocent—
the one who does these things will never be shaken. (Psalm 15)
I love the last line—that He who does these things “will never be shaken.” Firm. Steady. Grounded. Those are qualities fathers need as they lead their families and raise children to stand firm in their faith.
The heading of this psalm of David in the CSB reads, “A Description of the Godly.” More than anything, I wanted my husband to be a godly man, which translated to a godly husband—and now, a godly father. This psalm is one you and I can pray for the men we know as they continue to grow in each of these roles—especially as we think about new fathers this Father’s Day.
3 Ways to Honor New Dads
Whether you know a new dad or are married to one, how can you honor and celebrate him as he embraces the realm of fatherhood?
1. Make Him Feel Seen
My husband has done a tremendous job of walking alongside me during pregnancy—working harder around the house, being more attentive to what I need, and helping prepare for our baby. Though the spotlight is frequently on pregnant women for obvious reasons, I want to also advocate for spotlighting the husbands, the fathers.
What are some ways you can encourage and build up the new dad in your life (1 Thess. 5:11)? Maybe it looks like saying “thank you” more often or writing a note expressing specific ways you are grateful for him. Perhaps you can acknowledge the ways he’s stepping up or simply tell him how much you appreciate who he is and what he does.
Anxiety in a person’s heart weighs it down,
but a good word cheers it up. (Prov. 12:25)
Plan a date night at his favorite restaurant, cook his favorite meal, or surprise him with a thoughtful gift—the possibilities are endless. Making him feel noticed, respected, and valued builds him up as he continues to become the man—the father—God made him to be.
2. Consider How to Best Support Him
Whether he is encouraging his pregnant wife, navigating the adoption process, stepping into a father-like role, or praying to become a dad, men need support.
As you think about the dad-to-be in your life, consider: what are his gifts? Is he skilled at working with his hands? Is he great with cooking, yard work, or cleaning? Is he thoughtful about others, creative, or diligent? Hebrews 10:24 encourages us to “consider one another in order to provoke love and good works.”
If you are the wife of a new dad, you have a special role to play in supporting your husband. I think about the three colored strands of rope hanging in our living room, which we tied together on our wedding day as a representation of Ecclesiastes 4:9–12.
Two are better than one because they have a good reward for their efforts. For if either falls, his companion can lift him up; but pity the one who falls without another to lift him up. Also, if two lie down together, they can keep warm; but how can one person alone keep warm? And if someone overpowers one person, two can resist him. A cord of three strands is not easily broken.
You, as a wife, are in a unique position to support and love your husband in his new role. You see the ins and outs of every day, how he’s processing this season, what makes him happy, sad, and much more. You get to cheer him on—stand by him—not only as he pursues the areas God has gifted him in, but as he takes on new responsibilities that may be unfamiliar in his calling to fatherhood.
3. Pray for Him
The most important way you can love and honor your husband or the new dads in your life is by praying for them. We are in a spiritual battle on this earth and need to pray for these men to be strengthened and equipped to stay grounded (Eph. 6:10–17). Getting on our knees to seek the Lord on a dad-to-be’s behalf is an act more powerful than we will ever comprehend.
We have a huge privilege and opportunity to “pray at all times in the Spirit with every prayer and request,” and we’re told to “stay alert with all perseverance and intercession for all the saints” (Eph. 6:18). The following passage from Paul’s letter to the Ephesians is one I’ve begun to pray for my husband—one that is especially applicable for men as they become new fathers. These are the qualities I see in my husband and pray he continues to grow in as the father of our children.
I pray that he may grant you, according to the riches of his glory, to be strengthened with power in your inner being through his Spirit, and that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. I pray that you, being rooted and firmly established in love, may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the length and width, height and depth of God’s love, and to know Christ’s love that surpasses knowledge, so that you may be filled with all the fullness of God. (Eph. 3:16–19)
The Role of a Father
It’s no secret that dads play a pivotal role in the lives of their children. I think of my own dad who, though not perfect, is an exemplary model of what a father’s love should look like. While having a good dad is an incredible blessing, no earthly father will ever compare to God—the most perfect Father. No matter what kind of dad you have or had, God is everything you could ever hope for in a father and more. Among many other attributes, His unconditional, steadfast love, kind discipline, forgiveness, and protection are never ending.
As we see the men around us stepping into the domain of fatherhood, the most important quality we can pray for is that they would develop a heart after God’s own. As they seek Him, they will be transformed into God’s likeness (2 Cor. 3:18), reflecting Him in their own fathering.
I love watching my husband become a dad, even before our little one is out of the womb. This Father’s Day, let’s encourage new dads everywhere, honoring them in their God-given calling, and celebrating them for who they are and who they’re becoming.
A Prayer for New Dads
Jesus, I pray for the new dads—for those celebrating this Father’s Day with a new baby in their arms, for those watching their little ones squirm inside the womb or waiting on the adoption paperwork to come through, and even for those who are “hope-to-be dads” but are waiting on Your timing. I pray You would be shaping them into the men, the fathers,You have created them to be. Would You help these men to stand strong against the temptations of the enemy, to keep their eyes fixed on You? Let them trust You and rely on Your strength in their moments of weakness. Help them to be godly men, men of courage, as they lead their families and help raise their children. Let them display Your love through their words and actions and teach their children Your truths, Your way of life. May You fill them with grace, wisdom, gentleness, kindness, and Your love as they begin this journey of fatherhood. Amen.
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