For most of us, we know in our heads that God is big enough to heal broken relationships, even a troubled marriage. But if we've never seen an example, we might have problems understanding that with our hearts—especially if we're in the midst of problems with our spouse.
Although we usually focus on True Woman events here on the blog, I wanted to go in a different direction today and share with you the story of one woman who is finding healing in her heart and marriage through this message. I hope Laura's story will give you hope and encouragement in whatever you're facing.
Laura Mathias grew up in a home where church and prayer were considered important, but she didn't understand why. She stumbled through many years of not knowing what she believed and even denying God's existence. Then she met her future husband, Josh, who was a Christian. Josh challenged everything she thought she knew and believed about God and church and heaven. She heard the Gospel and finally understood that Jesus died for her sins.
Laura and Josh then dated for two years before they got married. Laura says this was a great time of being best friends, encouraging one another, going to Bible study. "I was really speed-growing in the Lord!" she said. But one year after their wedding, things started to change.
Somehow these best friends became enemies. They held tight to ungodly rights and attitudes that made peaceful conversations impossible. Laura said, "There was so much hurt and pain in our home—both of us trying to hurt the other back. I did not know how to let Jesus meet my needs and I was counting on Josh to do that, but it was all too much for him to handle."
As a result, Josh began to suffer from depression and avoided Laura and their home as much as possible.
The couple went to counseling, but it only helped on the surface. All Laura could focus on was her hurt, loneliness, and her husband's failures. While she tried everything to make her marriage happy, it was actually becoming an obsession.
One day, out of the blue, Laura got a call from Cynthia Fly, the women's ministry director at her church. Cynthia asked to meet with Laura and started to take her through God's Word. For three years they met together, as Cynthia taught Laura how to read and apply the Bible to her life.
This was the beginning of Jesus' redemptive work in Laura's marriage. "I enrolled in a Bible study at church on relationships and started going to Sunday school studying Brokenness by Nancy. I realized God was showing me I am afraid to be fully committed to Josh because I was believing lies. He also showed me that I was making an idol out of my marriage, because I wanted to do whatever it took to have a happy marriage and that was my focus."
Then Laura attended True Woman '08. Through this conference, God showed her the way He saw her heart.
Through all these years of marriage and disappointment, I had developed a heart filled with bitterness, anger, and discontent. God showed me I was trying to be in charge and in control of my marriage and that I was not trusting Him or His control over my life. I spent 90 percent of the conference in tears as I got a glimpse of my own sinful ways. For the first time I took my eyes off Josh and put them on my Heavenly Bridegroom and myself.
I called Josh from the conference and asked him to forgive me for expecting him to be my god by meeting my every need. I asked him to forgive me for seeing so many blessings as burdens and carrying around so much bitterness and anger. I decided to start trusting God for His decision for my spouse and to start becoming the respectful helper He called me to be for Josh.
God is overflowing my cup with peace and joy, even in the most difficult situations! One of the most amazing blessings from God is how He has broken me free from the anger I was holding on to and changed my heart from bitterness to compassion. I'm learning what it means to have Jesus meet my needs now, and I see Josh with new eyes."
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