Self-Control Sprinkles

Claire Black: Welcome to True Girl, a podcast for girls and their moms. Together, we’ll explore God’s truth for us, one drive at a time. Buckle up! You’re about to grow closer to each other and closer to Jesus!

Have you ever gotten so angry that you felt like you couldn’t stop your yelling or stomping or whatever it was, even though you kinda wanted to? That makes for one bad day, doesn’t it? For you and everyone around you!

The good news is that with God’s help, you don’t have to let yourself get that far in the first place. When the Holy Spirit works in your heart, you can exercise self-control.

In this season of the True Girl podcast, “A Recipe for a Fruitful Life,” Dannah Gresh and Staci Rudolph have been diving into the fruit of the Spirit. We’ve discovered how to grow in love, joy, peace, and all the other fruits that lead to a God-honoring life. It’s all based on the fruit of the Spirit in Galatians 5. And today’s the last one in this season!

Self-control is what Dannah Gresh and Staci Rudolph are talking about today for Season 15, episode 10, called “Self-Control Sprinkles.”

Here’s Staci!

Staci Rudolph: Dannah, why do you have gazillions of jars on your counter? I go to my room for half an hour, and now it looks like a science experiment in here!

Dannah Gresh: Okay, it’s not gazillions—it’s fifteen. But let me tell you the fruit we’re dealing with, and maybe it’ll make sense.

Staci: Alright, spill it. What’s the fruit?

Dannah: Black raspberries.

Staci: Oh . . . for jam? 

Dannah: Yep! Picked them last summer on my farm and froze them. Now it’s time to make some winter jam.

Staci: Yum! What’s first?

Dannah: We just need to grab the raspberries. 

Let’s see . . . not broccoli, not pecans. Ugh, how much ice cream does one freezer need? Oh, here they are!

Staci: Can I try one?

Dannah: Sure, but they’re—[Staci crunches]—frozen!

Staci: Yeah, definitely better as jam.

Dannah: Alright, let’s dump them in the pan. You grab the sugar. Here’s the lemon juice . . .

Oh no—[pauses, exhales deeply]—okay. [Under breath] Not gonna say a bad word. Not gonna say it. Not gonna do it. Lord, help me!

Staci: Wow, self-control in action! I’m impressed.

Dannah: Hey, we all have moments! But self-control is a fruit of the Spirit for a reason. It helps us choose what’s right, even when we don’t feel like it.

Now, let’s sit and talk about how self-control can sprinkle your life with joy. That’s gonna need to come to a boil anyway. Let’s sit at the counter where we can keep an eye on it.

Staci: Great.

Dannah: Oh actually, let me grab our Bibles. Here’s yours.

Staci: Thanks!

Dannah: Are we already on the last fruit of the Spirit?

Staci: I think we are. Yep. Galatians 5:22–23. I got it locked up here in my mind. You wanna hear?

Dannah: I do!

Staci:

But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against these things!

Self-control is the last one on the list.

Dannah: Alrighty then. What is self-control?

Staci: “Self-control” is a shorter way of saying “controlling yourself.” Meaning, you don’t get carried away by your feelings, thoughts, or what you want. You’re able to do the right thing even when you really want to do the wrong thing! 

Dannah: Like saying a bad word.

Staci: Or eating what you shouldn’t!

Except, Dannah, I think we should start calling it “Spirit-control!” As in, the Holy Spirit controls you, because on our own we can’t make ourselves do the right thing. It, too, is a result of the Holy Spirit!

Dannah: True! That is, you actually can force yourself to do the right actions some of the time. But you can do them with the wrong motivations or a grumbly heart. And that doesn’t change your heart, and it doesn’t affect the sin God sees in you. 

It’s like when the control comes from the Spirit, it’s sprinkled with . . . let me see, is it satisfaction? Accomplishment? Joy? It’s joy!

Staci: But how does God have self-control? Isn’t each fruit of the Spirit true of Him too? Why would God need self-control? Can God be tempted?

Dannah: Interesting question. The Bible tells us that Jesus “understands our weaknesses, for he faced all of the same testings we do, yet he did not sin.” That’s Hebrews 4:15. So, Jesus did face temptation. And He had the self-control to say “no” to all of it. He never sinned!

Staci: All of it?

Dannah: He faced every temptation people on earth have ever faced.

When you think about Jesus being tempted or tested, what comes to mind?

Staci: Hmm, sometimes I picture Him as the “perfect Jesus,” like He got straight A’s in life, and everything came easy for Him. But that’s not really what we know about Him, is it?

Dannah: No, it’s not. What do we actually know?

Staci: Well, for one, He wasn’t particularly special looking—that’s in the Bible, in the book of Isaiah. 

Let’s see . . . We know He was tempted in the wilderness, and there He faced some big tests—like Satan tempting Him to jump off the top of the temple or turn stones into bread.

His brothers didn’t think he was very special. That had to have been hard. Maybe He wanted to tell them, “Dudes, I’m GOD! In the flesh!”

Dannah: Those are huge temptations. Mine feel so much more . . . basic. Like wanting to say a bad word when I drop the lemon juice.

Staci: Exactly!

My temptations can feel . . . I don’t know . . . simple—like snapping at someone when I’m frustrated or procrastinating instead of doing what I need to. 

Dannah: But here’s the thing: Jesus also faced the same kinds of everyday temptations we do.

Staci: Like cheating, gossiping, laziness, overeating?

Dannah: Yes! Hebrews 4:15 says He was tempted in every way, just like us. He knows how easy it is to do the wrong thing and how hard it is to do the right thing.

Staci: That’s wild to think about. Like, He understands how much I mess up.

Dannah: He does. He understands it very much.

And yet, Jesus was sinless. That’s why He can help us. He gets it—He knows what it’s like to be human. Jesus lived it, faced it, and overcame it.

That’s why He could die on the cross for us in our place. He was perfect and sinless—a pure sacrifice!

Staci: Wow, it sure is amazing to think about it.

Dannah: It is.

Let me stir these black raspberries. They sure are smelling good!

Staci: Dannah, how did Jesus do it? How did he have perfect self-control?

Dannah: Well, he was God, but there’s a clue to that answer, something that could help us when we face temptation. 

Use that Bible there to look up Luke 22. This is a chapter in the Bible that describes Jesus praying in the Mount of Olives, a garden where He went with three of his closest friends to pray. It was right before He was arrested and crucified. He know what was coming, and He was so afraid that He sweat drops of actual blood!

Staci: That’s some fear!

Dannah: Is it possible Jesus could have disobeyed because of his fear?

Staci: That question is too big for me! But I’m gonna guess the answer is yes!

Dannah: Me too! Now, look at verse 40 of Luke 22. What did Jesus say to those friends who came with Him to that place?

Staci: He told them, “Pray that you will not give in to temptation.”

Dannah: So, then He went off and prayed. And His friends . . . well, they gave in to the temptation to sleep. Jesus comes back to them after sweating those drops of blood. And what did He in verse 46?

Staci: “Why are you sleeping?” he asked them. “Get up and pray, so that you will not give in to temptation.”

Dannah: Yes! Pray . . . why?

Staci: So you won’t give in to temptation.

Dannah: You remember that this fruit of the spirit—self-control—is a result of the presence of the Holy Spirit. Well, praying makes you more aware of the Holy Spirit’s presence, and it helps you lock into it.

You remember when you and I were in Washington D.C. a few weeks ago? We were waiting for the rest of the True Girl team after a late night of pizza. I was tired. And there was the rest of the team standing on the corner not coming to the car so I could drive to the hotel. I jumped out and shouted, “Guys! What are you doing? Let’s go!” That was not self-control!

Staci: Uhm, yeah! I wasn’t gonna be the one to . . .

Dannah: . . . say it? Yep! I said it. I was not self-controlled. But what did I say next?

Staci: You looked at me and said, “Staci, I’ve got to finish this long day like a Christian.”

Dannah: Yes, God’s Spirit convicted me. So in my heart, I prayed, “Jesus, forgive me! And Holy Spirit, give me self-control. My body is tired. I need Your help!”

Staci: And then, the team came. We drove to the hotel singing fun songs, and it was awesome!

Dannah: Self-control can change the atmosphere. It’s like sprinkling joy all over the place. But it cannot come from our own power. It usually requires us to stop and say, “Lord, help!”

Staci: I like that, Dannah! It makes me feel like it’s possible. Because I usually need self-control when I least feel like having it!

Dannah: I have a friend who reminds me to “Stop. Drop. And pray!” You know like “Stop. Drop. And roll” if you’re on fire. He says, sometimes our minds, our hearts, or tongues are like a fire, and we have got to stop, drop and pray for GOD to calm us!

Staci: Good advice! You know what, Dannah?

Dannah: What?

Staci: I never noticed before how much all the fruit of the Spirit relate to each other. You can’t have self-control if you don’t love God and others. When you have self-control you’ll be kind and patient and gentle. Actually, I think all of them—joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control—have to do with love. 

Dannah: Good point. That’s why you can’t just pick one of them. Some of them might show more in you than others, but if the Holy Spirit is working in you, all of them will show up to some extent and will slowly become more obvious in your life.

I should point out something else, too. You know, we’ve made a really big deal about how just trying to do better on your own doesn’t work. But it’s easy to believe the lie that the fruit of the Spirit, that it’s something we must do. 

Staci: That’s why we talked about it so much this whole season.

Dannah: Right. But that doesn’t mean that when the Holy Spirit starts working in your heart that it will automatically be easy for you to be loving, joyful, peaceful, patient, kind, good, faithful, gentle, or self-controlled! It still feels really hard, don’t you think, Staci?

Staci: Yeah, it does!

Dannah: You’re always gonna have to fight against the temptation to go the wrong way. It’s a battle. The great thing is you have God on your side helping you.

Staci: That’s good to know. Hey, do you want to pray for our True Girl friend, that the Holy Spirit would work in her heart to make her more like God?

Dannah: Of course.

Staci: Amen!

And now, that jam sure is smelling great! 

Hey Dannah, why did the raspberry stop making jam?

Dannah: I don’t know. Why did the raspberry stop making jam?

Staci: Because it found itself in a sticky situation!

Claire: Remember how at the beginning of this episode I asked if you’ve ever gotten so mad that you couldn’t stop being angry? Well, now do you see how that doesn’t have to happen? That’s right. If you get angry, you can stop and ask God to help you be self-controlled and repent of your anger. Isn’t it great to know that you don’t have to give in to your emotions?

As you’ve listened to this podcast season, maybe you’ve realized that you’ve never asked God to forgive your sins or to help you trust Him. You can do that now or any time! Talk to your mom or dad about it if you have any more questions.

How many of the fruit recipes Dannah and Staci made have you tried out? Ready for one more? If you don’t have black raspberries in your freezer, you might have to wait to make this jam until summer when you can hopefully find some. But you can find the recipe on our website at ReviveOurHearts.com. Or, ask your mom to look up a recipe for a different kind of jam made from fruit or berries you do have!

And that’s it for this season of the True Girl podcast! Be sure to keep an eye open for the next one!

The True Girl podcast is produced by Revive Our Hearts, calling women of all ages to freedom, fullness, and fruitfulness in Christ!

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Black Raspberry Jam

Recipe from The Outdoor Apothecary, July 2, 2021.

4 cups black raspberries

2 cups sugar

2 tablespoons lemon juice

Place black raspberries, sugar and lemon juice into a medium sized saucepan. Make sure there's plenty of room in the pan to prevent it from bubbling over—the liquid will get quite bubbly.

Cook the raspberries on medium heat until they have released their juices. Use a spoon to crush the raspberries against the pan as you stir. Then turn the heat up to high and boil rapidly. Thicken the jam by continuing to boil for around 8–10 minutes or until your jam reaches gel stage or 220° F (see notes below).

Once the jam reaches gel stage, remove from heat immediately and fill 6 to 8 sterilized, hot 4-oz. jam jars, leaving 1/4 inch headspace. If using soon, you can store in the refrigerator. 

If canning, prior to filling jars place a cooling rack or lid rings in the bottom of a stock pot and fill with enough water to completely cover the jars you will use. Boil. After filling jars with jam, wipe jar rim clean and screw on sterilized lids just until finger tight. Add gently to boiling water; once it is boiling again, boil for 5 minutes. After 5 minutes, turn off the heat and leave the jars in the water for an additional 5 minutes before removing to help prevent liquid in the jar being forced out by improper cool-down procedure.

Allow the jars to cool completely. Check that jars have sealed properly; there should be no button that can be pushed down. Store for up to a year.

Notes:

• Gel Phase Freezer Test: Pour a small amount of boiling jelly on a plate, and put it in the freezing compartment of a refrigerator for a few minutes. If the mixture gels, it should be done. During this test, the rest of the jelly mixture should be removed from the heat.
• This recipe can be halved with good results.

 

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