Let’s Talk about Laziness!

Woman: "And we urge you, brothers, admonish the idle, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with them all."

Dannah Gresh: That’s 1 Thessalonians chapter 5, verse 14. I want to zero in on one phrase: “adominish the idle.” What does it mean? We’ll find out today. All this month on Revive Our Hearts Weekend we’ll explore this power-packed verse. We’ll talk about work.

Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth: Jesus sanctified work done to the glory of God.

Dannah: . . . encouragement . . . 

Nancy: Encouragement is to our souls like oxygen is to our brains.

Dannah: . . . . service . . . 

Nicole Furno: Some days we have our schedules, our agendas, and Jesus is going to give us an opportunity to stop, to be filled with compassion, and to do something.

Dannah: . . . and patience.

Nancy: How do you respond when people annoy you? Do you have patient love?

Dannah: I’m Dannah Gresh, let’s start a month-long journey through one verse!

Let me read it again: “And we urge you, brothers, admonish the idle, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with them all.”

You’ve probably heard that verse many times before. But have you ever paused to consider what it looks like to actually put it into practice? That’s what we’re going to do today and in the coming weeks.

To start off, let me play for you the inspiration for this series of programs. Not too long ago, Colin Smith spoke to the Revive Our Hearts team members at a staff conference. Colin is a pastor and host of a radio program called Open the Bible with Pastor Colin Smith.

He used the verse we’re talking about, 1 Thessalonians 5:14, to explain that God doesn’t use a “one-size-fits-all” approach to soul restoration. Here’s what he said.

Pastor Colin Smith: God’s restoration will come through different means in different situations. You find that, for example, very clearly in the Scriptures in 1 Thessalonians chapter 5 and verse 14. “And we urge you, brothers, admonish the idol, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, and be patient to all.”

That’s discrimination, you see. Not one size fits all in terms of pastoral counsel. It’d be a disaster to encourage the idle. No, you admonish the idle. But you certainly don’t want to admonish the weak. You need to encourage the weak and help them.

So, we’ve all seen people, and some of you will have known this in your own experience. We’ve all seen situations where people were actually harmed because all they ever got was challenge, challenge, challenge when they needed a little bit of encouragement. And other people who may have been harmed because all they got was encouragement, encouragement, encouragement when what they needed was a robust challenge.

The good news is that the Good Shepherd knows how to restore your soul, and He’ll do it. And wise shepherds need to learn from the way of the Great and Good Shepherd who uses the means that are matched to the need and wonderfully restores His people.

Dannah: That’s Pastor Colin Smith. I love that picture of our Good Shepherd tenderly restoring each one of us as He sees best.

Now, let’s dive a little deeper. Today, we’re tackling that first item mentioned in that verse: “admonish the idle.” Right away, you might be wondering, “What exactly does admonish mean, again?”

One of the definitions that Merriam-Webster gives is this: admonish means, “to express warning or disapproval, especially in a gentle, earnest, or solicitous manner.” Webster’s 1828 dictionary says it means, “to reprove with mildness.”

That’s the key: mildness. You see, it’s all too easy to reprove with harshness! Right? I think we can easily imagine what that might sound like. It’s not so easy to reprove gently. That can only come when you’re motivated by the Holy Spirit and love for others.

But for the rest of today’s program we’re going to focus on the other part of that phrase. We’re supposed to “admonish the idle.” Now, “the idle” doesn’t mean those who take a break or go on a vacation. It’s talking about people who are characterized by laziness.

So here on Labor Day Weekend, we want to talk about work. There are many practical reasons not to be lazy, and Christians certainly aren’t alone in valuing a good work ethic. What is unique is why we believe work is important.

Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth talked about that in a series about Jesus. She was talking about manual labor, but the principles she outlines apply to any type of work. Let’s listen.

Nancy: Seeing that Jesus was a carpenter—He worked with His hands; He was a tradesman; He was a working man—reminds us of the nobility and the sacredness of work done to the glory of God . . . any kind of work done to the glory of God. He sanctified work, so to speak, including manual labor or what some would call perhaps “menial work.”

That’s got to be encouraging to those of us who have any aspect of our life that involves menial work. Anybody here have menial tasks that you have responsibilities for? We talk about how wonderful it is to be a mom, for example, but there are a lot about being a mom that is anything but glamorous. Right?

I’ve got a young couple with a new baby living in my house. They’re very excited about this baby. They love this baby, but there’s a lot of just grunt work involved in being a mom. Right? Changing diapers and other tasks of our lives. You say, “Yes, but Nancy DeMoss, she has this incredible job.”

I have people come up to me and say, “I want to do what you do.” Well, what they mean is they want to do the part of what I do that they can see, that they think would be fun. But what they don’t know is all the long hours, the digging, having a blank computer screen while I’m trying to write a book thinking, I have no clue what to say, and laboring and going through travail.

You have that in your job, in your calling, whatever it is, and in your spiritual vocation. Jesus sanctified work, hard work, manual work, grunt work, mundane work, routine work done to the glory of God.

He glorified His Father in heaven by working with His hands through all those years, perhaps supporting His mother and His other family members after Joseph died, which many think is likely.

You see, Jesus, in being a worker, in being a carpenter . . . He didn’t just go from twelve to being a Rabbi, to doing miracles and teaching. He had those years of working in His father’s construction business. We see Him affirming what the rest of Scripture says about work.

Work is a good thing done to the glory of God. It predates the Fall. Did you know that? Work isn’t just a consequence of the Fall. In Genesis 2:15, “The LORD God took the man and put him in the garden of Eden to work it and to keep it.”

Work is a great thing; it’s a beautiful thing done for the glory of God. It’s an assignment from God to glorify Him here on this earth. And Jesus was doing that with carpentry or construction. You do it, and I do it, in other ways, but it’s a sanctified thing.

First Thessalonians chapter 4:

We urge you, brothers . . . to aspire to live quietly . . . and to work with your hands . . . so that you may walk properly before outsiders and be dependent on no one. (vv. 10–12)

My calling, doing teaching, doing radio, writing books, is no higher or holier than your calling, caring for your home, working in your work environment. If it's God's calling, then it is for the glory of God. It's holy, and it is exalted.

Jesus was born into a poor, working class family. Working was not an option for that family. But by working hard, Jesus partook of our humanity. He identified Himself with common working people. By experiencing the tedium, the challenges, the laboriousness of hard work, He bore the curse placed on Adam, that he would eat bread by the sweat of his brow. That was part of Him bearing the curse of the Fall.

The problem is that we view significance and worth differently than God does. We tend to measure the value of what we do in terms of visibility, scope—how big it is, how grand it is, how impressive it is, the impact it makes on others. God doesn’t measure that way.

God’s not really impressed with how many people listen to this program or how many people read my books. What He wants to know is: Am I faithful at my work? Am I obedient in doing whatever tasks He has given me to do that day?

You see, in the will of God, obscure common labor is no less glorifying to God, no less significant, no less necessary than more public types of ministry, more impressive ministry acts or achievements. Having direct ministry into the lives of people is no more impressive, it’s no more valuable to God than you washing dishes, if that’s your calling at a particular moment of the day, or doing laundry or doing some other mundane, tedious task. It’s all for the glory of God, and that’s what makes it noble.

The fact that Jesus spent so many years doing work that many would not consider noble or inspiring, should encourage us to be faithful in carrying out the routine, ordinary, obscure tasks of our lives, and to do them faithfully and joyfully—even though no one else may see or applaud the work we are doing. We’re not doing it for man. Right? Who are we doing it for? The Lord. We are doing it as unto Him.

So we see that Jesus spent most of His adult life working in a physical trade, and only three years in public ministry. Those earlier years were not world-shaking, as we would measure, but they were vital preparation for His public ministry.

So I would just encourage you to let God determine the nature and the extent of your service in each season of life. Let Him give you your job description, and then do it for the glory of God. And don’t be in a hurry for broader, more visible ministry.

I have women come up to me, young moms . . . “I want to be in ministry.” I’m going to myself, “What do you think you’re in? You’ve got that two-year-old and that five-year-old. That’s not ministry? You have full-time ministry. You are in full-time ministry shaping and molding those young lives.”

You say, “Well, God hasn’t blessed me with children. I’m working in this office in an administrative position.” Then do it for the glory of God and realize that is ministry. Doing your vocation to the will of God is what glorifies God and reflects His glory in this world.

If God has put it in your heart to serve Him in other ways, don’t be in a hurry. Realize that God is preparing you. He’s seasoning you. Wait for His timing. You will be more effective in the long run if you will let God give you whatever ministry He wants you to have rather than pursuing or aspiring to have more ministry. God has given you and me as much ministry at this moment as what He has equipped us to handle. So fulfill it—fulfill it with joy.

Dannah: What a great reminder from Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth that our work—whatever that is—should be done to the glory of God.

You have to get that straight in your own heart before you can “admonish the idle.” And of course, none of us have perfect motivations all the time—that’s why we need others to admonish us!

That command to admonish the idle applies to everyone, but it’s especially crucial if you’re a parent. Proverbs 22, verse 6 says that parents are to “train up a child in the way he should go.” And believe it or not, kids aren’t born knowing how to work.

Jason and Erin Davis know something about that. They’re both part of the Revive Our Hearts staff, but they’re also the parents of four boys. In fact, they just wrote a book called Lies Boys Believe. Yep, that goes along with the other books in our Lies series! That book is coming out in November, so keep your eyes out for it.

Jason and Erin sat down recently to talk about how they teach their boys to work—both the skill of working and the motivation behind working. Let’s listen to their conversation with one of our producers, Phil Krause.

Phil Krause: I think all of us as human beings have moments we are tempted to be lazy or not do what we are supposed to do. Do you think that there is anything about boys that is more of a temptation for them?

Jason Davis: I think it can be more of a tempatation for them to be real lazy unless they get excited. They have to under the "why." I've found that, at least with the older ones. If you can get them to understand the why, the laziness is less of a struggle.

Phil: So motivation plays a part, you would say?

Jason: Yes. Moving the wood pile is one thing that they really hate doing. But I try to remind them that in a couple months when it is really cold outside and we are warm, we'll be nice and warm because this job was taken care of. It doesn't make it any more fun. But at least for the older two, understanding the why behind it helps make them a little more interested in doing it.

Erin: I'll talk in some generalities. Even in the Garden we see women gravitate toward a sinful tendency to manipulate or control, and men gravitate toward a sinful tendency to passivity. Our sons have human nature, and they have maleness. Probably in their flesh they are very willing to defer and let somebody else do the work. They do something like lay on the couch. That is something we face with them a lot.

I'm often reminding them that work is not a product of the Fall, fruitless work is a product of the Fall.

Work is actually a great thing. It gives us purpose. It helps others. It gives us an opportunity to serve people. So we are having a lot of conversations about work, working with a happy heart, not just working because you were told to do it, working with the right attitude.

Jason: . . . and balance. We want rest and the other parts of the human experience to be balanced out. When you are talking about the Garden, we know that God worked and created and then He rested. We want out boys to rest. But we also want them to work hard when it is time to work. So balancing that out and having the appropriate amount of those pieces.

Erin: I don't know if it is the generation you and I were raised in or how we are made, but Jason and I workers. I often say that there are war horses, there are work horses, there are show ponies, and Jason and I are work horses.

One area that we have to fight against is, we would push our kids to work all . . . the . . . time! That's not a biblical or healthy rhythm either. We have to fight our own tendency to fill every hour with work and expect our children to fill every hour with work. We fight this more than any tendency toward laziness in our own home and in the way we are made.

Jason: Right. One thing that I think has been beneficial is, "Here is an activity that we want to do. And here is an activity that we need to do." My mentor years and years ago said, "In ministry there are 'get tos' and there are 'got tos.' Don't neglect the 'got tos' and don't feel guilty for the 'get tos.'"

I think that plays out in all areas of life. It's been something I've reminded myself over and over again.

With the boys there are a lot of "get tos." There are things they are excited about doing. So we do the "got to" to get to the "get to."

Phil: The Bible tells us that the apostle Paul told Timothy to admonish the idle, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, and be patient with them all. Can you think of any times with your boys where you've needed to admonish, a little correction, perhaps, in this area?

Jason: The examples are too numerous to just pick one out. But what I try to do is to ask the boys to do whatever the job is and then remind them. Then if it is still not done, give them a reason why they want to do that.

On our farm we have a really great lap around the shop building and the house. After a couple of reminders, if we don't get it done, we run a lap. Sometimes that helps us remember. If not, we'll run another lap. And we'll keep running laps until we remember to get the job done. Usually it only takes one because the running of the lap requires more energy than just doing the simple job of sweeping the floor or putting the shoes away or whatever. One lap usually does the trick.

Erin: I think big picture that we are trying to infuse into them, "Work hard as if working for the Lord," or "Work isn't cursed, fruitless work is cursed," those kind of big picture motivations.

There's another thing I thought of as you were saying that, Jason. Every year on their birthday they get two envelopes. One is a privilege and one is a responsibility. We try for it to be age appropriate. The idea is with maturity comes greater responsibility and that's exciting and should be celebrated. And, with maturity comes great privileges.

And, of course, would they rather lay on the couch and watch TV? Of course, they would. They are people of flesh. We probably would too. But we've tried to communicate that work, all work, is not drudgery.

Jason: And if you understand the purpose behind the work, even if you are punching the clock at a job that feels like drudgery . . . If you are doing that to take care of your family and provide for those that you love, then the purpose is the motivator, not necessarily the work. I think having the right "why" makes a big difference.

Erin: It might surprise people that know us from Revive Our Hearts that we didn't always live on a farm. We lived in a city. We had a house in a neighborhood with a small back yard. Boy number one came along, then boy number two came along, and we realized that work ethic was something we were going to have to live. (Now, not everybody needs to buy a farm, or can buy a farm. That's not a mandate.) But part of it for us was wanting to raise sons who were contributors to the world. And that is feeding bottle calves and fixing fences and helping with the garden—all those manual things that come from living on a farm.

Phil: Excellent. Let's say there is a mom listening right now and her son is in his teens and all he wants to do is play video games all day long. She's like, "How do I cast a vision for him?" Like you say, the "why" is important. What would you say to her?

Erin: I'd probably point her to Romans 7. The idea of Romans 7 is that we are all in a battle with our flesh. Our flesh always wants self-exaltation and self-service. He's not a bad boy. He's a person of flesh, and so is she. Romans 8 is the good news is that in Christ we don't have to be slaves to that!

I think modeling is always important as parents. We can't expect our kids to live what we don't. Have creative ways to make work feel positive. Probably yelling at him to get off the couch is maybe not helpful. Invite him into the work you are doing.

There are few things more rewarding than a good day's work. In the middle of it, that doesn't feel true. But the end of the day when your muscles are tired and maybe you have a little sunburn on the back of your neck and you know you planted trees  . . . We planted the garden or you moved the woodpile, there is reward in that. I think work is its own reward. We try to celebrate it is as such in our home. 

Phil: How does self-control come into this whole issue of working and not being lazy?

Erin: I'm always a little reluctant to talk about parenthood on the microphone because we are cracked pots raising cracked pots. Our kids learned to parrot Scripture early one. On of the things they parrot is, "What is a man without self-control?"

And they will say back, "A city without walls."

It's this idea that comes straight from Scripture that when we lack self-control we are letting our guard down and we are the ones who will suffer. I think we are learning that principle. It does take that self-control to be diligent in any work. Whether that is learning something tough in school . . . There are elements in school that are hard, and they are different for each boy, where it feels like, "I can't do this. I can't figure out this skill."

Self-control steps in and says, "Stay at it. Keep your nose to the grindstone. Keep working." Part of it is encouraging them not to quit. We all have a lot of quit in us.

I know self-control is a biblical phrase. I wouldn't throw that baby out with the bath water. But what we all need is Spirit-control. We need the Lord to help us. In every area of our lives we need to say . . . I hope we are teaching our boys that when I want to do X, I can ask the Lord to help me to Y, because that is the better path.

I think work is a mechanism for learn self-control, and self-control takes a lot of repetition.

Dannah: We’ve been listening to Jason and Erin Davis talk about teaching kids to work. Now, let me say that the details of how parents do that vary from family to family. What should remain consistent, though, is the reason behind it. It’s about God, not us.

Actually, all of life is about God, not us—right? Whether it’s work or play, marriage or singleness, health or sickness, our purpose is to do everything for His glory, trusting Him to work His plan.

Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth talks about that in her book Heaven Rules. Whether you’re a single wondering what your next step in life should be, or you’re struggling with the chronic illness of someone you love (or yourself), or you’re a mom of teenagers with busy schedules, this book will remind you to look at your circumstances through God’s perspective.

This month, we’re going to send you the book Heaven Rules when you make a gift of any amount to Revive Our Hearts. You can do that by calling 1-800-569-5959, or go to ReviveOurHearts.com/weekend and click on today’s episode. When you get in touch with us, be sure to ask for your copy of Heaven Rules.

I hope you’ll join us next week! We’re going to keep looking at 1 Thessalonians 5:14, specifically how we can “encourage the fainthearted.”

Thanks for listening today. I’m Dannah Gresh. We’ll see you next time for Revive Our Hearts Weekend.

Revive Our Hearts Weekend is calling you to freedom, fullness, and fruitfulness in Christ.

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